idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
