You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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