carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
