I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
