I'm really into asian looking animals
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
