Having a random hookup so left but love u
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
