Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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