If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Randomize
