this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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