so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
