If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize