fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
