Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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