I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
