so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
