I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
