Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
