Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
