We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
