Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
