Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize
