Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(815): View more from Illinois

It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.

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(221): View more from

I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..

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(509): View more from Washington

no you're not allowed back

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night

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(541): View more from Oregon

It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now

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(720): View more from Colorado

Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love

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(226): View more from Ontario

Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.

(1-226): View more from Ontario

I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.

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(310): View more from California

Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor

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