That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
