The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
