were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
His nipple licking is glorious
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