I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
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