well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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