Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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