If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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