Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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