I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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