Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Say something about gay babies.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize