Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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