In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize