I skipped work to stalk him.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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