So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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