Small penises have feelings too.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
