also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
