he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
