What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
My vagina just recognized that song.
You're like the curious george of whores
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
