I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Randomize
