I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I need a beard to bite.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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