But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
