Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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