I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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