hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
We had sex on a dog bed..
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
