Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
