At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
