In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
And then he peed in my hair
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