dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
sex in a hospital.. check
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
