Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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