i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize