The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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